Return of the Comeback: Conversation with God

Tues, 10 Nov 2009.


This is my most recent conversation with God. Because law school and spirituality go together.

GOD: Oy, 'musta na?

ME: Oks naman.

GOD: O, enrolled ka na?

ME: 'Di pa tapos.

GOD: Anobeh, bakit hindi pa?

ME: E si Ma'm Guanzon kasi wala pa 'yung Loc Gov grade ko.

GOD: Pero pasado ka na?

ME: Yes sir.

GOD: E 'yung kay Arno?

ME: Pasado rin. Kaso naawa lang sa akin.

GOD: O ayan ha. Basta 'yung promise mo sa akin ha.

ME: Anong promise?

GOD: Na pag-pina-graduate kita sa UP Law, maghu-human rights ka at pro bono ng bonggang bongga. Remember?

ME: Of course naman.

GOD: So natuto ka na ng lesson sa lahat ng nangyari sa'yo?

ME: Anong lesson?

GOD: Tungkol sa paggawa ng groups sa FB.

ME: Ay oo naman. 'Pag ginawan mo ng Fezbook group ang professor mo, makwa-kwatro ka.

GOD: Korak. Kaya 'wag ka na gagawa ng FB group.

ME: 'Wag ka nga gumamit ng "FB," hindi bagay sa'yo. Two syllables na nga lang, shino-shortcut mo pa.

GOD: Meh ganon...E ikaw nga "Fezbook" e.

ME: Mas ok nga ang "Fezbook" kaysa sa "FB" e.

GOD: Whatever. Pam-bakla ang "fez" e.

ME: E mas bakla ka nga kaysa sa akin e.

GOD: Trueness. So kailan matatapos ang enrollment mo?

ME: Um, this week?

GOD: Hay nako, tapusin mo na 'yan! Classmates mo ba uli ang blockmates mo?

ME: Oo, 'pag Fridays.

GOD: Nyak. E 'di classmate mo uli si...

ME: Malamang. Pero kebs. Hahaha.

GOD: Oo nga. Kebs. Ano ba 'yan, bakit ganyan ka pa rin tumawa sa intarwebz? "Hahahaha" is so 20th century. New millenium na. Ang uso na ngayon ay "LOL". Or mas uso pa d'on: "lawlz".

ME: Yuck kadiri ka God ang tanda mo na, nakiki-lawlz ka pa.

GOD: I know right. (hairflip and beardflip)

END.

So Help Me God

First semester second year is coming to a close, and there is this deep feeling in my gut that I just might fail.

The truth is, you really can't rely on what others say. People kept telling me that first year of law school was the hardest, and once you've gotten over that hurdle, everything will be easier. But such is not the case.

I only have three subjects this semester: Constitutional Law 2, Property, and Agency and Partnership. So far, only Consti is really easy to understand, despite the exaggeratedly thick cases that I have to read. The other two subjects, well I can't even describe how much I barely understand.

It is in times like these that I find myself going to church and praying fervently to God. I know you're supposed to pray everyday, not just when you need something. And I'm sorry, God, if I leave you hanging after you grant my prayers. God, by the way, has granted everything I've ever prayed for. Everything. Of course that doesn't mean that if I pray for an SUV tomorrow, I'll wake up and find one outside my house. What I meant was that every reasonable thing I've prayed for was granted. There is truth to the saying, "Ask, and ye shall receive."

Some people may find it strange that even with my strong Roman Catholic roots, I still dabble in the occult, and I even blog about it. But there's nothing strange about it at all. Once you've reconciled and harmonized everything in conflict, the universe becomes a truly beautiful place.

So now I pray, please Lord, Father almighty, Creator of heaven and earth, I pray that you hear me. Make me pass this semester. And the semesters after that. And the bar exam. And I promise I will go to church. PLEASE! Thank you. I love you God, you're the greatest. Nice shoes.